• Anca

    March 5, 2011 at 2:17 am

    (ok to delete if considered inappropriate)
    When I felt validation of experience was needed (social proof), it was easy to provide/comment. Or sharing of techniques. Or intervening in a mockering situation. When I felt I was disconsidered or laughed at for the very intervention, it was easy to cease.

    Yet reading about sadness sometimes is not that easy to deal with. Because any comment feels pointless or worthless on my side, and what sometimes comes to my mind in such situations goes from bottom-up on a Maslow pyramid. (R U ok? Are those around you ok?)

    A virtual embrace & thoughts of wellness to you and yours.

  • megh

    March 7, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    Interesting thing about this website, is it was originally just that–a website, before the word “blog” and the concept and capability of receiving comments and having dialogue existed. I know that’s what internet interactions revolve around now, almost exclusively–getting “feedback,” approval, likes, some kind of validation. But if deepsicks (read: me) required that, this space would have died years ago. I have a few loyal readers, but it is not a popular site by any means, and the few who do read it rarely comment.

    And I’m fine with that. With what I write, reveal and conceal, so often there is no obvious way to respond to it. I never expect it, and am even sometimes unsure how to reply in turn. Which is also fine, and interesting for what it’s worth–I know the web is not a vacuum. But just as much, I know (and even state clearly in the “what is deepsicks” page) that this is not a diary. I wouldn’t want to share in a public space what are personal matters.

    And yet… it does come out, in oblique, peculiar ways. This post, for instance, has been a way to process something, if only minimally (a single image! a handful of words!), that’s been on my mind but that I would not otherwise openly discuss. And yet/but really, this is only and exactly what I want to say.

    I could see people being upset by this (to think it’s a tease or simply want to know more but not receive it, heh), but, as evinced by this website’s longevity despite others’ general disinterest (and my own disinterest in marketing it or trying to get more readers), this space is for me, not you.

    (Hm, and if it really *is* for me, why post at all? At what point is an audience or at least an out-in-the-openness necessary? Then again, were I doing this sort of expression “for me,” I would not have done it this way. Interesting, how self-censorship, despite that being such a pejorative concept, can also function as a creative structure and force.)

    I can also see people being worried by it, such as yourself, Anca, as you wonder what something means and feel compelled to write, though not knowing what exactly you’re responding to and expecting it will fall short, and just hoping that everything is OK. I assure you, everything is OK. Everything is what it is, is deepsicks, is the beginning and that’s the end of it.


    Concern is appreciated, though, certainly — but in the future, you needn’t worry. I can’t deny deepsicks is meant to be artful, and that that sometimes means producing uncertainty and angst — but it is not meant to rile up genuine, specifically-directed-to-me concern. I would not do that here.

  • Anca

    March 10, 2011 at 9:07 pm

    I see differentiated between the idea of a blog = a means / tools to public (sometimes private, or restricted to a group) online information and the assumption of blog=activity of putting updates online. Am quite aware/ I view this site simply as (sometimes) an outlet of concepts/art.

    Any association with diary, or an actual insight into someone’s life is so further from my mind, from my own personal experience on the discrepancies between online content and elements/fullness of actual life. Interesting though, as minimalistic as outlets of information can be (speaking for my own web experience), they do represent a … point of entry or relating with (for lack of better metaphor/example)

    Am aware also with the idea that any ‘expectation of interaction//dialogue’ is but an idea of my imagination, since people are free to interact/or abstain as they consider so. My own interventions are *for me* as you highlighted, for my own peace of soul that I expressed what I considered worthy or necessary. How it comes at the other end, if it actually helps or presents an interaction for the person, if it places extra words/thoughts to deal with or not… is something that I can assume of (rightly so or wrongly so), or know if bounced back.

    Appreciated. Understood.

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